9 Different Ways To Know If Your Partner Genuinely Loves You or Not

There are several ways that can actually help you to gauge how much your partner loves and cares for you. But the first and foremost thing is that it is important to know if they truly love you or not. Here are some of the ways that can help you to learn whether your lover truly loves you.

  1. The person should not be selfish in bed: Ah well, this is the first and foremost thing that you need to take care of and observe carefully. Your partner should be extremely careful and take care of your likes and what actually turns you on or off. Your partner’s motto should not be only sex and nothing else. rather he/she should understand what is good and what is bad for you. Your partner should be your best friend when in bed also.
  2. Your partner will always stop you from doing anything that is irrational: Whenever you seem to do anything irrational, your partner who truly loves you from the core of his/her heart will always stop you from doing so.
  3. He/She takes good care of you when you happen to be sick: Suppose you suddenly fall ill, and then a true lover will definitely care for you as much as they can and even going beyond normal limits. After all, they love you. But someone who does not love you truly will never ever do so.
  4. They always ask for your opinion: Whenever, any important decision is to be made, then if your partner truly loves you then that person will seek your opinion and discuss with you and never simply impose their opinion on you.
  5. Your partner does not feel insecure in case you happen not to pick up the call: Suppose you overlook his/her call and fail to answer the call, then if your partner truly loves you from the bottom of his/her heart, then the person will never feel insecure and frustrated. They will take it as a normal situation that can occur to anyone.
  6. They believe in and also do small things to make you happy: Well, in true love, your partner will always have a belief that small things can make each other happy. So, always keep in mind this is another vital point that distinguishes a true lover from a fake one.
  7. They will always listen to you and not simply hear what you say: Well, there is a stark difference between hearing and listening. While hearing is simply a physiological process, listening is a psychological process. Hearing involves simply hearing anything and everything, while on the other hand listening means properly hearing and then analyzing what you say and acknowledging what is perceived. And the vital thing is that a true lover will never hear but always listen properly to what you say.
  8. They boldly say that they love you: True lovers will never ever be afraid to say it loud that they love you. They will boldly exclaim that they love you and will never be sacred to utter those three golden words.
  9. They have the same behavior in front of friends: It is another vital point perhaps. Only a true lover will always behave as they always do in front of their as well as your friends. If they behave differently, then it is a thing of concern.

This entry was posted on May 12, 2016.

Does Love Truly Hurt

So many people come into my office with broken hearts from struggling or failed relationships. They conclude that love hurts, that love and passion can not exist in the same relationship, or that you should not give your heart away completely or you’ll get hurt.

They start to associate love with pain.

But does love really hurt?

It may seem that love is the cause of a lot of your pains and heartbreaks. However, the truth is that love has never hurt you. And never can. Love is a powerful emotion that brings out the best in us, that elevates our spirits. Why else are we always looking for this crazy, little thing called love?

So if love doesn’t hurt, then what is causing the pain in our relationships?

It is whatever takes love away.

Here are some causes that takes our love away:

1. Hurtful words
2. Broken promises
3. Needs not being met
4. Misunderstandings

And other causes that penetrate a deeper wound like

5. Lies
6. Deceptions
7. Betrayal
8. Selfishness
9. Abandonment
10. Any form of abuse

Essentially, it is not love that hurts us.

In fact, love is a beautiful, powerful energy we are driven to seek. However, what I have found is that while we all looking for love, we do not always know how to keep and protect our love from being harmed. What hurts, then, is when we do not know how to love… it is like building a home without having the proper tools to construct it.

Love uses tools such as: compassion, selflessness, consideration, thoughtfulness, kindness, empathy, generosity, understanding, attentiveness…

And just like a home, love needs maintenance. You can not expect love to stick around if you do not take care of it. Your foundation will crumble.

So if ever you’ve been hurt, do not blame love for your pain… Mainly because if you do, you are going to fear it and push it away when it tries to come back again, causing you continued pain.

Love is the antidote of pain and heals all wounds. It makes you trust again, makes you believe in the wonders of connection again and in the possibilities that anything you want can happen.

So, if you want to keep love in your life, make sure you have the right tools… and that you’re using them.

Be true to your heart and spread your love!

 

This entry was posted on May 3, 2016.

Love Poems From My Heart

Poem 1

This is a Poem from my heart about living in the present moment and enjoying the attention, presence and love of the One for You!

Just BE with me.

Just Sit with me.

Just Allow me to Dwell in your divine succulent presence.

Just BE you without distractions.

Just BE you without your protective walls.

Just BE you, the romantic king that makes my Queen’s heart swell with divine love.

Just BE you, the gentleman that I know you are and can choose to Be.

Just BE you, the kind and loving soul that I know you are.

Just BE you, the authentic perfect “designed by God” king made for greatness destined to soar and roar.

Just BE you, my Hero, the one who swept me off my feet with your divine sexy eyes and generous heart.

Let’s carry each other in the beauty and magnificence of our united spirits, in this moment.

The only moment there is.

Just BE with me in the NOW.

No one else exists.

No one else matters.

Just you and I.

Your attention is more priceless than anything you could ever give me.

So just BE with me in this moment, because for now, only you and I exist surrounded by the grace and love of God in the sacredness of our unity. Just BE with me.

Queen Marième Faye

Poem 2

A Love declaration from Queen Marième’s Heart to her King’s Heart

I fell in love with you heart,

Then your spirit romanced me.

Your soul snatched my unconditional love and refused to let go.

My spirit said yes.

My soul said yes.

My body said yes and yearns for yours since then.

You are the apple of my eyes.

I know that God loves me deeply because He created You just for me.

You amplify my joy.

You uplift my spirit.

You make me feel beautiful, sexy and divine.

You bring out the divine feminine and the goddess in me who is captived by you.

The Queen in me yearns for the King in you.

I can’t wait to fully surrender myself to you forever; spirit, mind, soul and body.

I can’t wait for us to be ONE under God.

You make me feel safe, loved and cherished.

You treasure me as I treasure you.

Together, we shall continue to raise each other’s hearts to the level of pure, divine, deep, authentic unconditional love.

Love that some people only dream of and experience through romantic movies.

Love that we get to experience every day, lost in each other and into each other.

Love that makes the birds sing for us every morning as they can feel our hearts’ connection.

Love that make us feel joy, happiness and bliss everyday.

Love that conquers All hearts, elevates spirits and seduces souls to ecstasy and full divine communion.

This is how much I love you my dear King, this Love that I have for you is purely unexpected which makes it so much more powerful and exciting.

I love you mon amour, mon coeur, mon chéri, ma vie.

Queen Marième Faye

 

This entry was posted on April 28, 2016.

So What Stands in Your Way From Having a Satisfying Relationship Finding Out Is the Key to Success

Many women are quite “susceptible” to suffer after a broken relationship. The reasons might be many, and might differ from one woman to another. However, the main issue is, whether a woman can “learn” how to maintain a successful intimate relationship and not having the need to look for a new partner time and again. The answer is quite a simple one: when you develop Self-Awareness, getting to understand what, in your attitudes and behaviors cause a relationship to fail, you can then become empowered to develop and maintain a successful intimacy.

Some of the ways by which you sabotage your relationships

To love and be loved is wonderful. However, when you love “without borders”; when you give of yourself unconditionally (which is very romantic); when you “sacrifice” yourself “at the altar of the relationship”; when you let your partner dictate the nature of the relationship (or lack of), rather than making sure you have a relationship of mutual give & take, you then might find yourself, time and again, frustrated, bitter, sad and alone.

What makes you behave in such self-sabotaging ways?

The reasons might be many, and might differ from one woman to another. You might behave that way out of low self-esteem; out of fear of abandonment; out of bottomless need for love; out of the belief that giving oneself totally to their loved ones is heroic, altruistic, etc.

Regardless of what drives you to behave in ways which sabotage your relationships (time and again) it is quite likely that you are unaware of what you do wrong. First, you don’t see any “wrong-doing” by offering so much love. Second, if you would have been aware of the ways in which you sabotage your relationships you would have probably make the necessary changes by now.

Lack of Self-Awareness drives you to sabotage your relationships time and again

Many are unaware of the needs and fears which drive their behaviors (such as: fear of abandonment; the need to be loved and appreciated). Nor are they aware of the behavioural patterns they have developed throughout the years based on these fears and needs (such as: sacrificing yourself; being there 100% for your partner, etc.). The behaviors and attitudes you think will “save” your relationships and “save” you from being left by a partner, are exactly those which sabotage your relationships and leave you alone, once more.

However, not being aware of this turn of events, you are likely to continue behaving in these self-sabotaging ways over and over again, regardless of how many relationships you have had.

Developing your Self-Awareness is a key to becoming able to maintaining a successful intimacy

Developing your Self-Awareness is the key to becoming able to understand your self-sabotaging behaviors and the needs and fears which drive you to behave the way you do.

It is only when you become aware that you begin to realize how you shoot yourself in the foot in relationships until now (believing you are doing “the right” thing and not realizing the opposite is true).

Now, with your new awareness, you begin to understand what you need to change in your behaviors and attitudes. You also begin to see what you can do in order to control your needs and fears from driving you to sabotage your relationships once more.

Self-awareness empowers you to begin being assertive with potential partners; knowing realizing your right to having a mutual give & take relationship; and knowing how to set up borders even with your loved one.

The road to Self-Awareness

The road to Self-Awareness shouldn’t be paved with difficulties. If you tread this road with positive thinking and attitude, believing that, at the end, it will lead you to becoming stronger and more empowered to maintain a successful intimacy, you will realize that you enjoy and appreciate the process, the journey, the way leading up to finding a partner with whom you will develop a relationship which will be based on true love, mutual give & take and appreciation.

Doron Gil, Ph.D., an expert on Self-Awareness and Relationships, is a university teacher, workshop leader, counsellor and consultant, and the author of: “The Self-Awareness Guide to a Successful Intimate Relationship. In his book Dr. Gil teaches you how to understand what stands in your way from successful intimacy, realize the ways by which you have sabotaged your relationships until now, and enables you to become empowered to develop a healthy and satisfying relationship

 

This entry was posted on April 16, 2016.

11 Sneaky Intimacy Tricks

1. Greet your partner in a way that creates deeper connection.

Pay attention to how you greet your partner. Is it with a list of chores? Or problems? Or just a sideways ‘Hi’ without any eye contact?

What to do instead:

Stop what you are doing; your partner deserves a minute of your undivided attention. Look at them, smile, hug and hold them dearly while hugging for at least 10 seconds (champions go for a whole minute! Let me know if it’s you here). This is better done in silence.

Your relationship will benefit immensely! And this will only take a minute, at most two.

2. Add a 30-seconds kiss to your daily routine.

I think this is pretty self-explanatory. Remember how you used to love kissing in the beginning of your relationship? It’s time to go back to that feeling! Kiss, be fully present and explore different ways of kissing.

3. Sneak a loving sexy note.

Write a note for your partner and put it in their pocket or be creative with your bath mirror.

How easy is this?!?

Right?

Post a photo of your note here! I’d be delighted to see your creativity.

4. Focus on loving thoughts.

Look at your partner and think loving thoughts, feel love in your heart and imagine that you send your loving energy right into their heart.

You don’t have to speak to your partner about it.

I had an argument with my partner yesterday. Afterwards all I did was focus on loving thoughts and what I love about him. It’s amazing how much it changed the energy between us, and somehow he became oh so huggy and loving with me!

5. Notice, pause, appreciate.

Goes like this:

  • You notice what your partner did for you today, the simplest, most ordinary thing – picked up groceries, looked at you with a smile, played with kids, put his socks away, cooked dinner for you, said you look nice today, etc.
  • You pause and pay attention to the thing that your partner did for you.
  • You look at your partner and say: “Darling, I so love it when you do… It means to me that… (I have a partner, you care about me, you consider my feelings, etc.) It makes me feel… (loved, respected, appreciated, etc.) It makes my life… (easier, happier, more exciting, etc.)
  • It’s truly astonishing what this simple practice of noticing, pausing and verbally appreciating your partner can do to the amount of intimacy you share.
  • Don’t you think this is easy to implement? Let me know how you get on.

6. Use beam gleam.

This trick comes from Dr Helen Pooler.

In social situations when your partner is on the other side of the room, look at them and say with your eyes ‘I love you, you matter to me, you are so special to me’. Send them a beam gleam and notice how your partner reacts.

7. Go to bed together.

We are in a vulnerable state when we fall asleep. We are defenceless and innocent. So when you fall asleep with your partner it creates more safety in your relationship. Most of us need to feel safe to feel love and be loving.

Do you have a habit of going to bed at different times and maybe working and doing chores? This habit could be very damaging to your love. Make a commitment to go to bed at the same time at least twice a week.

8. Touch your partner every day in a non-sexual way.

Touch! We all need it so much! Babies brains don’t grow to their full extent if they don’t get enough physical contact. They can even die from the lack of it.

Sometimes we might use sex to get the touch that we need or use sex as our security blanket, to reaffirm to ourselves that we matter to our partner. This is usually a turn off for the other.

Relationships fail to thrive if partners don’t give each other enough touch.

Pay attention to how often you touch your partner through the day. The goal – 3 points of touch contact. Maybe a hug, a pat on the head or holding hands. Advanced practitioners can do a head massage or a foot massage.

9. Assume that your partner loves you and cares about you.

Quite often we jump to the conclusions like “He doesn’t care enough.”, “She doesn’t appreciate me”, “It’ll never work” or something similar. What is your habitual conclusion?

When your partner upsets you make it a habit to assume that your partner still cares about you and loves you. Notice how differently you act when you assume the best. Share with us here!

10. Break the routine.

Do something unexpected together! Challenge yourself, push your boundaries, play with a fantasy or do something that you’ve always wanted to do, but are scared. Maybe now it the time to experience it together?

What will it be?! I’m excited to hear! Share here.

11. Help, please!

What is one of your sneaky intimacy tricks? Please let me know! I need to prepare myself for a surprise date my partner has organized for us. So please, do me a favor, email your favorite sneaky trick and I’ll include it here.

Choose one and go for it. Share your successes and struggles on our Magnetic Women Club page. Ask questions and I will personally reply.

Though maybe right now you constantly argue and you just don’t feel like focusing on loving thoughts and can’t even imagine sneaking a sexy note into his pocket.

Then you need my 13-Step Formula to Stop Arguments From Destroying Your Connection!

 

This entry was posted on April 7, 2016.

Is It Love Is It Abuse Is It Neediness

They met at the workplace and began dating. A few months later he moved in with her, to her own place. As a divorced man, having owned no property (he never told her whether he ever had one and whether he left it to his ex), he was happy for not having to extend a contract on a leased apartment.

So far so good: They were “in love”. They dreamt about life together, “until death will do us part”. They enjoyed coming back home after work, sitting on the bench, looking at the sunset, eating dinner together, with a good bottle of wine, night after night, as if they have done it for decades.

… And time went by. And they gotten used to each other – whatever “used” means. And they got accustomed to life’s routine, life’s structure together.

And then one day, out of the blue (or was it a stormy day?) he asked her if it will be o.k. that he’ll bring his adult son to live with them; he is 20, unemployed at the moment. Would she mind?

We don’t know whether she minded or not. We can believe that, in all probability, she didn’t mind. After all, who will mind when there is such a great love between them? And besides, what’s love after all, if not coming towards your partner, accommodating his needs and requests?

So the 20 year old son moved in with them.

So far so good: She felt like a stepmother (even though she wasn’t much too older than the boy. But, alas, not having children of hers, why not “pretend” and play “as if” he was her child? And besides, what shouldn’t she do for her partner?)

You would have thought that the story ended here. But no: The end is yet to come.

Some months went by; the son was still living at her home (claiming that “as soon as he finds a job he will rent his own place”). She felt somewhat betrayed, cheated, but said nothing. After all, why rock the boat? Why take the chance that her partner will get angry at her? This is exactly what she doesn’t need, that he will get angry at her, and God forbid: he might even leave her!

So she said nothing (maybe now is the time to mention that she and her partner have seldom, if at all, communicated openly about issues. After all, as a “man”, he didn’t talk much. And being who she was, she didn’t encourage him to share. How they spent their evenings together looking at the sunset is unknown; apparently in silence).

Yet, everything seemed to be going “smoothly”. In silence, with not much communication, but smoothly (whatever that means).

But then one day – as it often happens – sitting by herself on the bench drinking wine (did she know why he was late coming home that day?), it finally downed on her – how did it happen now and not earlier is a riddle – that she is the one paying for all household expenses, for herself, for him, for his son: for all three of them!

Oh God! She cried within herself, how didn’t I notice it before? How could I be so stupid? Have I been taken for the ride? She asked herself; has he been taking advantage of me?

These thoughts shocked her. NO, this is not the way she wants to think about him; this is not the way she wants to think about their relationship.

Could it be that until now she hasn’t paid attention to these issues out of the “enormous love” she felt towards him? Could it be that she was still driven by the early promise they made to each other when he first moved in with her that “what’s mine is yours, what’s yours is mine”, neglecting to see that except for “so much love” he contributed nothing?

We don’t know. It is almost impossible to know what’s going on in one’s head, especially in the head of someone who is willing to sacrifice herself “at the altar of a relationship”; who is willing to be taken advantage of “for the sake of love”, just so that she won’t be left alone.

Was she aware of the fears and needs that controlled her?

We don’t know. People are often subjective when thinking about themselves as well as about the relationship they are having. Many behave one way or another based on fears and needs which control them and drive them to self-sabotage and self-sacrifice themselves.

In addition, many often refuse to acknowledge this to be the case; often, they find a thousand and one excuses to justify to themselves why they behave the way they do, why they tolerate their situation. Often, they get angry at whoever attempts to shake them off their perception of reality and show them the true nature of their relationship.

So we don’t know what was going on in her head; what other thoughts were running there, back and forth, while she was sitting on the bench, drinking her wine, waiting for her partner to come home; we don’t know whether she contemplated what to tell him; whether to confront him. We don’t know whether she thought to herself “enough is enough!” and whether she felt ashamed of being taken for the ride for so long.

… or whether she re-affirmed to herself that she is a loving person; and that he loves her – in his own way – and that their relationship is “just fine”; maybe not terrific, but better than being alone.

I don’t know.

But if, by any chance, you know, please tell me:

Is it love? Is it abuse? Is it neediness?

Doron Gil, Ph.D., an expert on Self-Awareness and Relationships, is a university teacher, workshop leader, counsellor and consultant, and the author of: “The Self-Awareness Guide to a Successful Intimate Relationship. In his book Dr. Gil shows you how you sabotage your relationships and what stands in your way from successful intimacy.

 

This entry was posted on April 2, 2016.

Love May Begin With A Bondage, But It Ends With Freedom

This life goes on. We meet people and we befriend them on business terms, casual or in a deep relationship. We know folks cannot stay in our lives forever unless they are family. One day they have to leave. Then why is it that we cannot digest their separation? Why is it that we feel so bad and distressed when they look happy in their company and we feel something is not right. This is the feeling of overbearing or possession. It’s our basic instinct since ancient times. The medieval kings and queens had possession for jewels, richness, and kingdom. Some had addiction for protecting their beauty family or relations. They did everything in their power to claim what they loved, but in the end, it fades off. This is what I want to stress here. People and things do not stay or live with you forever. They will have to leave someday whether you want. Even your soul leaves you when you are old and fragile. These are just material aspects then why to fret to over them and lose our lives just like that.

Some people are the greatest consumers and sound like control freaks. They think they can have anything or anyone in the world, which is pure hallucination. Psychologists term this as a kind of disorder and get a treated for that. It works ultimately if the patient lives in a recouping environment and gets a thorough understanding of what life is. We ought to let go of the things we cannot control. Truth is having everything in your life would not make you happy but anxious. The more you get the more you will fret about its protection and safety.

Where do I keep this gold, this money, and these jewels? How do I protect my man my girl, my friend from that good for nothing-loud mouth? This is mine, she/he dare not touch it, or I will slay him. My dear friends this does not make sense. What was yours will remain yours if it is ought to. There is no pointing in forcing someone to be with you or you both will suffer a lot. Manipulations will only lead to sadness and loss. Love is not tagged with a punch line of “BEING MINE” or “PRIVATE PROPERTY”. Some view its oneness in a single person while some make it divine. They respect and love everyone equally and categorically. Nothing is less or nothing is more for them. Such folks tend to live longer and without any bondage of affection.

I am not taking any sides. OK? There are no sides. You can be in love like Christian and Anastasia or you can take a step further to turn into a divine providence. It is your choice in the end. Just be happy in whatever you choose and let others be happy with you. Life is too short to give pains to people so whatever is left please keep it as good and do not hurt others.

So long my friends. See you soon.

Having everything in life may make you happy but it wont give you the real satisfaction. We are born because of God’s order and our aim is to spread happiness around us but it cannot be done unless we stop to consume or possess things for our selfish motives.

 

This entry was posted on March 26, 2016.

For the Person You Are

download (42)A healthy relationship has no need for petty games, as such never make him/her feel disrespected, unimportant, or controlled. Instead make her/him feel loved, important and needed in the relationship, show the one you love what REAL trust and communication looks like. Nobody wants to go through a cycle of pain, lies, and betrayal and nobody should!

Love between two people has been and always will be a verb and as such is requires action. That means both parties need to make it crystal clear just how much they love one another, honestly if a person is constantly saying that they love you and no action is taking place (whether it’s big or small) that is just not going to work out.

A small gesture of love is not too much to ask and the person you want to be with needs to understand this.

The ability to accept your partner (and vice-versa) for who they are in the moment you fell in love with them and not with the person who they *may* become is without a doubt a major key to a successful relationship. Nobody wants to be with a person who refuses to accept the present for what it is.

Any relationship that lacks true honesty is doomed from the get go, because eventually the lies will build up and come crashing down destroying everything you both have toiled to build, however with communication and forgiveness is can definitely be amended but the relationship will be forever changed dishonesty is a hard thing to get over (to say the least). Honestly honesty is an essential building block to a sturdy love.

Knowing what you want out of the relationship beforehand is always a good thing. Being up front and vocal about it is also for the best because mixed signals can lead to horrible things (very horrible lol), and never ever ever ever settle for less. Commit to being happy within any relationship you choose to enter whether its for a short time or a long stay.

Trusting another person comes down to a personal decision and if that person decides to let you down… Remember they made a choice to do so, and since everyone deserves to be with a truthful and caring person if you find they can no longer be that, then why stay any longer?

It’s very hard to trust a person to do the right thing after they have crossed that line and staying in the relationship may cause you unnecessary strain in your life. Let them make the choice because it’s ultimately up to you how many lies you are willing to put up with in the end.

One true mark of a good relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. Pretty much a love void of secret and lies. Who wouldn’t want to feel love like that?

No point in being in a relationship without getting and giving some type of support. Learn how to love you, Be Yourself.

 

This entry was posted on March 20, 2016.

The 7 Habits of Smart Magnetic Women – How to Be Happy In Your Relationship & Mesmerize Your Man

download (41)By harnessing the power of habit you can enjoy the life and relationship you really want.

Here are the seven habits of smart magnetic women that will keep you feeling nurtured and vibrant with lots of love in your heart.

Are these habits part of your daily life? Which ones do you need to adopt to create the life that delights you?

There is simply no way to create a deep intimate connection with your partner, if you don’t prioritise your self-care.

If you don’t have a habit of putting yourself first on your to-do list, then you probably feel resentful and depleted, or blame your partner for not giving you what you need.

This energy is not magnetic! And your partner won’t be inspired to give you what you need if you appear resentful, demanding or needy.

So, what can you do about it?

Put first attention on yourself. Find out what you feel, and what you need. Fill your love tanks up. When we are nourished we are more relaxed. Also, when we are more relaxed, we have the ability to make a request, rather than blame.

Of course we know that there is a request behind every blame. But when we feel stressed and unloved, it might be really hard to make a request that inspires action. The resentment will sneak out, he’ll sense it, and shut down. The energy behind your requests is crucial.

I invite you to take a stand for your life and practice extreme self-care. What makes your eyes shine? What fulfils you, and makes the stars fall out of your heart, and onto every passer-by?

There are seven fundamentals that are vital for women to fully enjoy life.

#1. Movement

To connect to our bodies, we need movement that brings us joy. Are you dancing, or practicing any other kind of movement that makes you feel excited, and ready to jump out of bed? Think of movement rather than exercise. The thought of exercise can be draining, and that is the opposite of what we need.

#2. Healthy Diet

Yes, Beautiful, yes. Healthy eating is important for love.

How is your diet? Sometimes nutritionists make it rather hard. In fact, it’s pretty simple. Eat more raw greens, colourful veggies, and fruits. Buy as little as possible packaged food, and drink lots of pure water. Homemade food prepared with love, and joy can do miracles. Start eating more fruits, and sweet root vegetables, and you will have fewer cravings for sweets.

I invite you to become curious about your relationship with food, and start treating your body with love and respect, as if you are feeding your baby. Of course, you want to feed your baby the most nutritious food.

#3. Sleep

We need rest. Sleep is so essential for us to feel sexy and loving. Don’t underestimate its significance? They say that for our biological clock to be at its best, we need to go to sleep by ten at night, and get up by seven in the morning. This makes us feel thrilled about the new day, and more inclined to share our love with our man. Do you feel loving and sexy when you are tired? Make it a habit to go to bed by ten, in order to enjoy your dreams.

Sleep is far from a waste of time. It recharges our batteries, fills us up with patience and love, and allows our spirits to process each day’s events in a gentle manner.

#4. Spending Time with Girlfriends

It’s amazing what the company of women can do for us. Have you tried a girls’ weekend away? It can do wonders. We nourish each other, and we fill each other with sensual, calm, and nurturing energy. Finally, talking about our feelings without someone else, trying to solve the problem. What a miracle. Girlfriends are the best people to talk with, and unload our “stuff.”. They listen, and know we just need to talk, and empty our heads. After we are nourished and cleansed, we have much more capacity to meet our men, and be ready for romance.

#5. Time Alone and Spiritual Practice

How do you feel after spending time by yourself? With our busy lifestyles, we often forget how good it feels to spend time alone, and connect with ourselves.

We need to have alone time to centre ourselves, and check what is happening inside. We need time to distance ourselves from our life’s everyday issues. We need time to see the bigger picture, to plug into the energy of the universe, and to sense the higher purpose of our lives.

#6. Time with Nature

Fresh air heals our bodies, purifies us, and gives us so much energy. The sun energises us, increases our happiness hormones, and supplies our bodies with important vitamin D. The wind blows out destructive thoughts, and wakes up the sensuality of our skin.

#7. Sensual Touch and Sex

“Sensory stimulation is a nutrient that the brain must have to develop and function normally.”~James Prescott

Make a “touching date” with your man. It’s better to agree that you won’t go into sex. Just caress each other, feeling the skin, and awakening your senses. Choose whose turn is first to receive and indulge in the feelings without trying to give your touch, and love at the same time. Be totally selfish! Then, when it’s your turn to give, fully give, and enjoy giving. If you touch each other at the same time, it diffuses the intensity, and doesn’t give so much pleasure. Try to be in a completely giving or receiving mode. This can feel very vulnerable and exciting; so explore!

We need sex. It’s not just about pleasure; it’s important for our well-being, and full enjoyment of life.

So, by taking care of yourself, you will take care of your relationship. Not caring about yourself is selfish. You are less patient and have less to give.

 

This entry was posted on March 8, 2016.

How to Choose Your Partner and Build a Stronger Relationship

download (40)Finding the right person and building a relationship is the topic of the century. More and more people break up, divorce or find themselves lonely and disappointed by their partners.

In my own journey I have tried to understand what have I overlooked. It turned to me that key and most common to a couple’s success is the willingness to invest. Just like you take time to go through education, specialize in your job, learn a foreign language or raise a child, a couple is no different. Requires effort to build it and constant attention and interest for your beloved one. Here is what to look for in broad lines and 3 categories.

Firstly, at the beginning, you need to look for some common grounds related to life in general. Mind for similar level of education and career aspirations, choice of geographical location, desire for long-term relationship or building a family. Same applies for lifestyle expectations, religion and values or sexual compatibility.

Secondly, watch for deal-breakers: vices, infidelity, abuse, immaturity, 3rd party intervention, self and self-worth insecurities, care for appearance and cleanliness. As you dive into the relationship, recheck for point 1 above: religion and upbringing differences, long distance, significant income differences, money interests or money or fame greed, another family, interest for personal development.

Thirdly, if you feel comfortable that the above criteria does not raise major issue, then, it is worthwhile paying a closer attention to building your partnership at a stronger level. Perhaps you have already been doing so, which is great, this will therefore only raise your awareness.

1. Build each other’s confidence, treat with trust and respect
2. Support individual projects for further personal growth and sharing
3. Ensure time together for common passions and hobbies
4. Practice positivity, patience and whatever you do, do it with good intentions and love
5. Increase your level of presence and embody two-way communication (when in conflict talk about facts and your feelings without throwing arrows at the other person)

As the relationship advances and years pass, perhaps remind yourself to:

1. Make sure you stay in touch: hug, kiss, write, talk, plan for connection and intimate moments
2. Realign your priorities, interests and vision for success (avoids unmet expectations)
3. Don’t get lost in roles (parent, child or toxic relationships; you are an adult for your couple) or lose identity (do only things that other wants and not take care of self)
4. Practice healthy communication (positive feed-back, allow SARAH, conflict resolution)
5. Don’t get caught in thoughts, worries and material possessions, but take life with ease and be in the flow. That will bring security and joy in a natural way

How do you know he or she is the right ”one” for you?

If all things in the right direction, you feel it. Your intuition tells you. You effortlessly flow in the same direction, you dream together, you do not care what others think or say. Your partner is your friend, lover and confident and you grow together. In a partnership fears are waived, feelings are not guessed but shared, disapproval will be done from equality. You are comfortable together and you want to be part of each other’s activities even if they don’t seem extremely special. Doing nothing is wonderful together. You are joyful, energized and passionate. Conversations unwind, you laugh at each other without hearting feelings and you don’t feel an urge to control what the other is doing.

Depending on your stage in life and personal agenda, above may or may not apply. You may wish to decide for yourself what is the criteria that matters at every step. Make your own list of ”musts” and ”deal-breakers”. Whilst picturing it, you may come to realize lots of things about what is important to you, what really matters in your relationships and what are the things that you could never come to terms with. Generic recipes don’t work for everybody. They are meant to kick the process of self-discovery, investigation and personal development.

 

This entry was posted on March 1, 2016.